Awareness

by Anthony de Mello

9/10

Key Idea:

Nobody was mean to you. Somebody was mean to what he or she thought was you, but not to you.
Anytime you have a negative feeling toward anyone, you’re living in an illusion.
Happiness is a state of nonillusion, of dropping the illusion.

Other interesting notes:

You are in control of what you are aware; what you are not aware of is in control of you.
Most people, even though they don’t know it, are asleep.
Waking up is unpleasant, you know. You are nice and comfortable in bed.
The one thing you need most of all is the readiness to learn something new. The chances that you will wake up are in direct proportion to the amount of truth you can take without running away.
When you’re ready to exchange your illusions for reality, when you’re ready to exchange your dreams for facts, that’s the way you find it all.
Don’t substitute your greed for another, spiritual, greed. With true awareness there’s nowhere to go, nothing to achieve.
You don’t need effort. That’s why people are so tired, so weary. You and I were trained to be dissatisfied with ourselves.
The reason you suffer from your depression and your anxieties is that you identify with them.
One understands one’s personal worth when one no longer identifies or defines one’s self in terms of these transient things.
Words cannot give you reality. They only point, they only indicate.
Not even the greatest guru in the world can take a single step for you.
If you just suppress your desire, and you attempt to renounce the object of your desire, you are likely to be tied to it.
We don’t want to be unconditionally happy. I’m ready to be happy provided I have this and that and the other thing.
Grief is a sign that I made my happiness depend on this thing or person.
Do you want to change the world? How about beginning with yourself? But how do you achieve that? Through observation. Through understanding.
As you identify less and less with the ‘I,’ you will be more at ease with everybody and with everything. Because you are no longer afraid of being hurt or not liked. You no longer desire to impress anyone.
Awakened person: a person who no longer marches to the drums of society, a person who dances to the tune of the music that springs up from within.
We see people and things not as they are, but as we are.
You will never understand yourself if you seek to change yourself. The harder you try to change yourself, the worse it gets. You are called upon to be aware.
Steps to wisdom. Put this program into action, a thousand times:

  • identify the negative feelings in you;
  • understand that they are in you, not in the world, not in external reality;
  • do not see them as an essential part of ‘I’; these things come and go;
  • understand that when you change, everything changes.

Thoughts on the book:

Very good book. Some overlap with Way to love.

Longer summary/notes: KK, CR

If you like this, you’ll probably like: Way to love, Tao te ching, A guide to the good life, How to relax, books